Press Release: Los Angeles Chargers Coach Marcus "Kerm" Kemp Addresses Suspension

In a recent interview, Coach Marcus "Kerm" Kemp of the Los Angeles Chargers opened up about his recent suspension for stat padding, which also led to a suspension for star running back Austin Ekeler.

On Strategy Adaptation

"Nothing is going to change," Kemp declared, exuding confidence. Just call him butter cuz he's on a roll! The Chargers' game plan remains as steadfast as ever.

Haters in the League

Coach Kemp made it clear that the accusations don't faze him: "They are praying for my downfall. At least I know I have haters this cycle." As cool as the other side of the pillow, he seems unshaken by the controversy.

The Running Back Committee

"I’m just going to do RB by committee," revealed Kemp, indicating a versatile approach to the offensive backfield. "See, what had happened was…" there won't be a single Ekeler replacement; it'll be a team effort.

Team Morale and Future Plans

"Nothing changes. Play good defense and don’t turn the ball over," Kemp emphasized. And the Lord said you've got to rise up! The focus remains solely on the upcoming game against the 0-3 Raiders.

A Message to the Fans

"It’s not [going to affect us]. We are focused on the Raiders this week. One game at a time," Kemp reassured the fans. You ain't got to go home, but you got to get the heck up outta here if you think this is slowing down the Chargers.