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Chaseroonie

Member Since 8 years ago

Blog Entries

2017-11-27

Atlanta First, Denver Worst..

Atlanta is the leagues best team, posting a recent dominating performance over the 3-3 Ravens, 83-2.  The team is 3rd in overall offense and 1st in overall defense.  The second largest margin of victory came against the Browns, winning by 30.  Said James, operator of the Falcons, 'We are thankful for the way our season is playing out so far. I have the pleasure of coaching up some of the best young men to ever play this game. We’d like to give thanks To clover valley tuna fish  for keeping our players healthy and strong. We look forward to the rest of the season and we will see you guys in the Super Bowl!''.  With Freeman, the teams RB posting a staggering 6.8 yard per carry average, you cant exactly just stuff the box to fix that problem, because you have the leagues best in Matt Ryan and Julio Jones to light up the passing game.  Opponents will not find beating this team easy.  What does come easy in this league is beating the Broncos.  Says Chase, owner and operator of the Broncos, 'I just caught Trevor Simeon sucking off one of my players on the practice squad and Mike (McCarthy) is conducting a circle jerk with the other coaches in his office.  You have Von (Miller) over there working on the contents of his next Old Spice Commercial, but at least he is playing football on the field, the dude has 14 sacks.  I'll have to spend more time in the lab as an operator, i simply have not practiced but in terms of personnel, there are a lot of pussy ass shit going on with the players..'  When asked about Lynch, Chase stated' Lynch doesn't have a problem with his ability to play, he's top 5 when it comes to talent, he is just mentally retarded and i mean that literally.''  Paxton Lynch has an IQ of 44, and to qualify for a mild case of mental retardation, the National Assessment of Psychology states that an individual would score between 55-70.  Sources have confirmed that Lynch has an IQ of 44, making him mentally retarded.  Lynch leads the league in interceptions and is on pace to throw the most interceptions in NFL history.  When asked if that's just partly the operators fault, Chase responded, 'Fuck off, i am done answering questions, the Broncos are going to improve, we are going to hit the lab and make the improvements that are necessary.  I'm on top of this''.  That's what she said.

Article by Joe John, writer and contributer for the Sunday NFL Ticket League.

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