Drinking the Yaterade - Season 73 Predictions
by AST1N | 3 years ago | 0 Comments
All good things must come to an end. The Patriots dynasty. The Cowboys and 49ers in the 90s. The Steelers in the 70s. And now, we see another. The Adelman Commish dynasty. Is this a weird comparison? Absolutely. Will it make any sense, whatsoever? Probably not.
However, the run as commissioner Adel had in the past half-decade cannot go undervalued or unnoticed. When Adel was active and throwing out content, it was some of the best things for the league. Engagement and excitement were at an all-time high. When he would disappear, so would that same engagement. I don’t know many in this league that have that same kind of impact to the league.
It was no secret that times were changing recently. You could feel it. And just like the recent Brady-led Patriots, you could see the dynasty closing. And just like Brady bolting to Tampa, Adel also closed that door while it was still barely staying open. No one can say that the Patriots run wasn’t great. No one can say that Adel’s run as a commissioner wasn’t great, either.
While I personally was one of the biggest critics of him over my time in this league, it wasn’t because he wasn’t doing great things. It was me wanting more for the league and knowing he has the magic touch to make it that much more. Some may call this intro section a commish (or ex-commish now) slurp, but I feel it is necessary to give him my public appreciations after all these years.
Now here’s to the future. We are still in great hands and the foundation is still strong. Red Zone is still a great place to be and I have faith in our new commissioner team that is joining JP.
Mr. Adelman. Thank you.
Alright, enough of that. I feel gross. Time to get on to the recap and Season 73 Predictions!
SEASON 72 Predictions
Sprinting too early
Whoever was in charge of scheduling the Vikings schedule was setting them up for success early. We saw this happen with Kansas City last season. I wouldn’t be surprised if they end up as the last undefeated team in the league (Cincy also should be in the same boat). Then in Week 12, it ramps up and ramps up HARD. It wouldn’t surprise me to see the Vikings as the last undefeated team AND not end up as the 1 seed in the NFC. (I am also rooting for an undefeated Vikings and undefeated Bengals game in Week 14, but I know there’s like a 1% chance of it happening.)
Man, this was so close to being perfect! If only Jake didn’t have a late season collapse that somehow lead him into a late season/playoff surge, the Week 18 MIN/WFT could have been for the 1 seed and everything would have aligned as I hoped. While the Vikings did in fact remain as the last undefeated team, they were able to keep the 1 seed. However….
Don’t give up hope
If you have watched things unfold in Week 3 and 4, you will have seen the Washington Football Team struggle mightily against the Giants and 49ers, which many will question is this the real WFT? I declare it is not. I have faith that Coach Chappy will right the ship and get his team going, and give a nice late season push to reclaim the lead in the NFC Least. If he cannot overtake Monty, the NFC will have some tough Wildcard teams with TB/CAR and himself.
Man, I called this one. While I didn’t project them to win it all, I knew both the coach and the roster could get things back on track and figure it out. Self-high-five! [slap]
Ass Backwards
The AFC E is weird. Right now they have completely flipped their standings upside down through 3 weeks (Jets-Pats-Dolphins-Bills). Don’t be alarmed, it will all fix itself. I predict that the Dolphins will finally overtake the Bills this season, those two will find themselves on top soon enough, assuming Robo doesn’t decide that this team plays better without a coach and let’s them play on their own.
Dolphins finally overtook the Bills, even so much it lead them to a berth in the Super Bowl. I didn’t expect the Bills to struggle as much as they did, nor did I expect Kad to make a late season push to 10-7. HOWEVER, the sun rises in the east. The sun sets in the west. The Jets stink at football. Some things will never change.
Rising Red Sea?
The NFC playoffs are going to have 1 Wildcard available (WAS/NYG and CAR/TB will take the other two). Don’t look now, but the Arizona Cardinals are 3-0 and leading the NFC W. Do I think they keep that lead? I give them a 36.2% chance to win the division, but as of right now I think the 49ers will end up winning it. That will leave the 3-0 Cardinals to fight off the 0-2-1 Rams and 0-3 Seahawks to compete for 2nd in the division, which Spencer has a big lead over already. I like the odds of the NFC West’s 2nd to be better than the NFC North, so they are my favorite for the 7 seed. Dallas could end up being a sneaky pick here as well.
Congrats, Spencer! You made it past the 36.2% odds! I knew it was your year.
Season 72 Offensive Rookie of the Year – QB Jack “Killin” Skillin, Las Vegas Raiders
Remember when BM was all like “Ben Banks is the QB of the future!!!” and then sent him to the bench for the rest of his career? That was a fun ride. J-Skillz is the best QB prospect we’ve seen in quite a few seasons, and now we get to see if he will develop into a stud or end up like Peterson in Philly.
The Jack Attack has some shiny hardware he gets to hold on to for the rest of his life. Enjoy that award young man!
Season 72 Defensive Rookie of the Year – MLB Jason Johnson, Minnesota Vikings
Johnson currently leads all rookie defenders in tackles and INTs, although it’s still early in the year. This past draft had a bunch of really athletic linebackers drafted in rounds 1-2, so if it’s not him, it will likely be one of his positional counterparts.
Johnson was a finalist for the award, which defensive awards are the hardest to guess on. I’ll be happy that I didn’t fall completely on my face here.
Season 72 Offensive Player of the Year – QB Baker Mayfield, Washington Football Team
As we’ve seen, this defense is going to struggle a lot after trading away two of their top CBs. That means they are going to rely on the offense to win them games. I could also see Scary Terry as another guy would could be deserving of the title, as these two will be hooking all year long. I would also keep an eye on Ruggs in LV and Zeke in Dallas, as well as Lamar and Tua.
OH LOOK AT ME. BAKER AND TERRY AS MY ONE/TWO VOTE GETTERS. Sometimes I have to stretch my wording to make these predictions work. This season I was on my game.
Season 72 Defensive Player of the Year – S Jeremy Chinn, Carolina Panthers
Mr. DoItAll himself, Chinn is a playmaker who is always near the ball, regardless of where it is at on the field. With 3 INTs already on the year, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him finish with double digit INTs, 3+ TDs, and top 10 in tackles for safeties.
An award finalist with 8 INTs and 5 TDs. Close enough.
Season 72 Most Valuable Player – ATH Lamar Jackson, Baltimore Ravens
WHAT?! You don’t think I learned my lesson from last season? Of course I didn’t! Lamar will put up similar stats as he did last season, except this team isn’t going to be neglected all year (crosses fingers) and will be back in the playoffs. You can’t stop Lamar, you can only hope to contain him, which QB contain on the edges doesn’t work and QB spies just get outrun….. so really he can only stop himself… or if his coach goes M.I.A.
Look, I will say it a thousand times. Lamar doesn’t get the love he deserves. The amount of attention the opponent needs to take to stop him puts him in a class above everyone else. Yes, Baker and Terry broke records. Teams also weren’t scheming their entire defense on how to stop one guy. How can a team have TWO most valuable candidates? Baker doesn’t put up the numbers without Terry and Terry doesn’t put the numbers up without Baker. Lamar is more VALUABLE than either of these guys (This is not a knock on them, but more about what this award SHOULD be). Ravens win the 1 seed, carried by Lamar. Give him the love. /slurp
Season 72 Superbowl Prediction
Cincinnati Bengals 37, Carolina Panthers 28
Missed the playoffs 37, 1st round exit 28
There we have it! Because Season 72 was so good for the predictions, I fully expect Season 73 to be a complete shit show. To every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. For every right, I must have some wrongs.
Season 73 Predictions
Enough is enough
The Bengals missed the playoffs. The Bengals just lost to the CPU Broncos. Some might say those are alarming. Not me. I say those are motivating. THE BENGALS WILL WIN THE AFC NORTH. Adel had his fun, now it’s back to Moji’s turn. Trading DeAndre Hopkins to a potential Super Bowl threat. That’s good for the league! Sometimes you just need to step back and ask yourself “Is this compensation worth the agony of watching my guy hoist a Super Bowl trophy this season?”
The race for world first
By about Week 10ish, we start to get a glimpse of who is pushing for the playoffs and who is just getting their shit pushed in. Half the teams eye wild card spots, the rest start eyeing draft position. The race for the 1 seed will be a new team this year. Sorry Jets and Falcons fans (Is that something to be sorry over?) The Seahawks are going to win the top pick in the draft and get their QB of the future, and they might not even need to blow many games in the process. Here are teams that *should* beat them: SF, ARIx2, LARx2, NE, LV, PHI, BUF, MIA. So that’s 0-12 right there. Of these 7 games, I could see either side pulling it out and might favor most of them (GB, CHI, DET, NYJ, NO). Even if they split, we are looking at 3-14. The QB position is suspect on the team, and the team as a whole is bottom 5 in overall talent. It will be an uphill battle for this roster/team.
Long live the king
A long, long time ago, there sat a man/boy who decided screw your rules, I am hucking and chucking this rock as much as I can. He is remembered as Gstar, but with our INT regression rules he would now be known as Gnormal. Anyway, he had Matty Ice throw for 6,223 yards in a 16 game season back in Season 53. In a 17 game window, that is 366 yards per game. We currently have 4 players averaging more than that, and others pretty close. It really wouldn’t surprise me to see someone toss 6k yards this year and flirt with the record, especially now that 15 carries a game isn’t going to slow some guys down in games they absolutely should be throwing it late.
The Colts stink
That’s it. Don’t think I don’t remember you burning one of my predictions to the ground in the first season of the cycle. I am here to remind you.
Side note: Does anyone know if Darius Leonard is available for trade?
Wild, Wild West
Y’all ever watch “Wild, Wild West” starring All-Pro Actor William Smith? Yeah, me either. But both conference’s Western folk will be having some divisional battles. First, the NFC. It wouldn’t shock me to see the Rams actually pull this out this season, with the Niners taking a wild card spot and the Cardinals sadly watching from home. A big shift from last season. In the AFC, give me the Raiders taking the division, the Chargers to grab a WC, and the Chiefs to barely miss out.
Season 73 Offensive Rookie of the Year – QB Jeff Rushing, Tampa Bay Buccaneers
It is awfully bold of me to pick a late 4th round player to win this award, but I am feeling dangerous today. We saw how Roc took Cole McDonald and made him usable. Don’t scoff at Rushing’s OVR, it is highly drug down by his AWR rating, which is meaningless.
Season 73 Defensive Rookie of the Year – DT MIKE JONES!, Buffalo Bills
How Jones fell to the 2nd round baffles me. He is strong as shit and will throw your OL out of his way. Will the voters give big boys love two years in a row?
Season 73 Offensive Player of the Year – QB Tua Tagovailoa, Miami Dolphins
Do we call this a redemption tour? I heard that with all of the money Miami gave him in his cancelled contract + his new contract with Miami, he has purchased his own private island and has been working out there this offseason. You wouldn’t believe how good the Bahama Mama’s are that his personal caterers provide for guests. 10/10, would go back just for those. Aside from that, he is looking very good and if I was in the AFC, I would be afraid of what he’s developing into.
Season 73 Defensive Player of the Year – S Justin Reid, Minnesota Vikings
Justin Reid’s last three seasons INT numbers: 3, 10, 12. He currently has 3 INTs in 2 games. I would be absolutely shocked if he doesn’t hit 10+ again this season, especially looking at his schedule.
Season 73 Most Valuable Player – QB Tua Tagovailoa, Miami Dolphins
This will be where Lamar will finally get the love he deserves and I finally look dumb in NOT picking him. Will he be deserving of the award? Probably. Did he bribe me to put him here with allowing me to visit his island? No comment.
Season 73 Superbowl Prediction
Cincinnati Bengals 41, Carolina Panthers 31
Yes, I know this is who I picked for Season 72. I think I just jumped the gun by a year.