Drinking the Yaterade - Season 72 Predictions
by AST1N | 3 years ago | 0 Comments
Happy holidays Red Zone! It is the season of giving, and no we aren't talking about all the teams struggling with three-pick sits. Secret Santa has been a huge hit and many guys are getting absolutely spoiled out here. If we didn't like each other, it wouldn't be nearly this great. We have come a long, long way and I can say I am grateful for all of you. Christmas is two days away and I truly hope you and your families have a great weekend, that your kids (if applicable) are full of joy, and that you all stay safe as it's a crazy world out there.
My gift to you? Predictions!
But first, the recap:
The Colts stunk before and they will continue to stink in the future
Alright, I’m going to be real with you. This is only here because they made me look stupid last season, so I just want to tell White Greg to eat a bag of dicks. And I am talking like Costco-sized bag. Just gobble them all up. I will never believe in you again.
Alright, listen up. You might be all like “FIEEEEEEEELD… they made the playoffs! You whiffed this prediction!”
Here’s the real facts. They finished 2-6 against teams with a winning record, one of those “wins” being a game they lost and the s2w was scuffed. So really, they were 1-7, and the 1 win was against the 9-8 Jaguars. So I’ll say it again…. The Colts stunk before and they will continue to stink in the future.
The Throne
No, this isn’t about “King (or Queen)” John’s made up title. Or where Trent takes most of his snapchat pictures from. Wait a second, with “John” being interchangeable with “toilet”, is he the Toilet King??
GET IT TOGETHER, FIELD. THIS ISN’T ABOUT HIM!
Sorry, folks. Sometimes my thoughts take over and I can’t help myself. What I am really talking about is Eikim. Now who had “Eikim” as a topic on their Yaterade Bingo sheets? Now by this I mean Robo has taken over for ol’ Mikey. Great drafter, but pretty “meh” on the sticks. It’s a rookie mistake to overload one draft with great players, especially on a team that has a lot of work ahead of them. By the time the team starts coming together, that 3+1 is going to be hiding around the corner ready to punch you in the groin. If Robo can keep drafting like this every season then maybe it will work out in the end, but I still see the Jets finishing bottom 10 this season as well.
Nailed it. They were terrible and had a top 5 pick. And wouldn’t you know it, they had another great draft.
NFC East: From Least to Beast
Last season, many of us thought the NFC E was going to be a 4 man race, and it really fizzled to work out that way. I’m here to tell you now, IT’S FINALLY GOING TO HAPPEN. I think all 4 teams will end up 8-9 or better. The Eagles aren’t going to be tanking anymore, Pat started to figure things out late last season, and we already know about tweedle-dee and tweedle-dumb fighting for the top spot.
Yikes. These guys stink. Monty looks like he might be back in it, but Pat and Tauph are still trying to figure things out.
Watch your back
Last season, the AFC North was Adel and Moji…………………… and then the other two. I think that gap may close a bit and I will be able to remove a few of those periods in the gap.
The Steelers had two giant holes heading into the cycle. No offensive line and terrible QB play. Both were upgraded in the off season, and Derek Carr is pretty dang good.
The Browns will get heat for trading away Baker, but let’s not kid ourselves. It’s not like Longville was blowing people away with him while he had him. He just needs to get Jaymiss to manage the game (big ask, I know), but putting two burners in Anthony Schwartz and Curtis Samuel to go along side of OBJ should help open the field for him to get to what he does best, pounding the ball with an elite HB and the best OL in the league. Oh, and have you heard of this Aaron Donald guy? He looks good on paper.
The Browns made huge strides this past season. Adel made strides too… just the wrong way. Theo still has some serious work with that roster, but his offensive line is finally coming together (they were ranked 32/32 in the pre-cycle OL rankings). Unfortunately for the rest of the division, Moji is also improving their roster, so there isn’t any ground to be gained yet.
The Sewer
There are 3 divisions that are just going to be bad as a whole.
In order of worst to best: NFC North. AFC East. AFC South.
There was a point last season where the NFC North had all 4 of their teams around .500 or better. Don’t let that fool you. The North will always be the North in RedZone. I can see a lot of teams improving in the league, and if teams are getting better, there has to be teams who get worse.
The NFCN had one team over .500. The AFCE saw the Dolphins significantly improve, but those bottom two teams… yikes. The AFCS looked better on paper, but as we saw with the Colts, I’d put that more on their schedule than anything. Let’s keep it real, the AFCS is always going to be the Texans.
Season 71 Offensive Rookie of the Year
WR Jarred Hatchett, New York Giants
You don’t give up two years worth of draft picks to give the ball to Kenny Golladay. Monty is going to feed Hatchett early and often, and you can’t blame him. He is a special talent. I like Peterman’s potential, but I think there will be growing pains with Tauph that will cause some inconsistencies in his play.
Hatchett is going to be in the conversation for the award, and may even win in. HOWEVER, digest this before you vote (yes, it’s Week 4 and we haven’t voted): Hatchett had 64 catches and 25 DROPS. For reference, no player in the NFL in the past 5 seasons have had more than 13 drops in a single season. That’s crazy, I don’t care what you say.
Season 71 Defensive Rookie of the Year
MLB Kordell Bayless, Los Angeles Rams
Another guy who is just physically gifted. With Ramsey shutting down one side of the field, teams will either look to the other side of the field or in the middle. Also, with Donald leaving, that will just open up more need for someone to step up, and Bayless will be that guy for the team.
Bayless will likely win this one, but could you imagine how his stats would have ended up if his opponents would stop disabling him from doing anything with the Y-button hack???
Season 71 Offensive Player of the Year
QB Aaron Rodgers, Cincinnati Bengals
Bengals offense? Great.
Bengals defense? Ehhh….
I think Moji will rely on his offensive star power to keep him in games, which leads me to believe that Rodgers carries the team on his back like he is used to doing his whole career.
Rodgers has my vote on this one. Also pretty crazy how a team can rely on a guy all year and then do their best re-enactment of Andy from Toy Story dropping Woody and proclaiming “I don’t wanna play with you anymore.” Three seasons, three different starting QBs for the Bengals.
Season 71 Defensive Player of the Year
MLB Jamin Davis, Washington Football Team
Pick a 2nd year player to win this award? You betcha. Another freak athlete like Bayless who will be relied on to make plays. With guys locked up on the outside, you will be forced to test Davis in the middle, and I wish you good luck with that.
Jamin had a very solid season leading the Football’s to 79 tackles, 3 sacks, and 5 INTs. While I don’t think those are high enough to say he was the most valuable of ALL defensive players in the league, I am sure Coach Chapstick won’t complain with how his young star played. Who is going to win? I have no idea. If you think I am going to sort through every team’s stats, I’ve got some bad news. [Insert WadeBarrett.gif]
Season 71 Most Valuable Player
QB Lamar Jackson, Baltimore Ravens
We are about to see a 4,200 pass yard, 1,000 rush yard play lining up at QB. If you don’t see that as ultimate value to a team, you might need to reassess what the award means.
LOL.
No. BUT we did see Lamar pass for 4,379 yards and 949 rush yards. Is that a crazy output from a QB/HB hybrid? Absolutely. But it is hard to vote MVP to a guy on a team who didn’t win half their games. That value gets lost.
Season 71 Super Bowl Prediction
Baltimore Ravens 38, Washington Football Team 20
If I am wrong about any predictions, please make it this one.
Rest assured, we avoided that one. *PHEW*
SEASON 72 Predictions
Sprinting too early
Whoever was in charge of scheduling the Vikings schedule was setting them up for success early. We saw this happen with Kansas City last season. I wouldn’t be surprised if they end up as the last undefeated team in the league (Cincy also should be in the same boat). Then in Week 12, it ramps up and ramps up HARD. It wouldn’t surprise me to see the Vikings as the last undefeated team AND not end up as the 1 seed in the NFC. (I am also rooting for an undefeated Vikings and undefeated Bengals game in Week 14, but I know there’s like a 1% chance of it happening.)
Don’t give up hope
If you have watched things unfold in Week 3 and 4, you will have seen the Washington Football Team struggle mightily against the Giants and 49ers, which many will question is this the real WFT? I declare it is not. I have faith that Coach Chappy will right the ship and get his team going, and give a nice late season push to reclaim the lead in the NFC Least. If he cannot overtake Monty, the NFC will have some tough Wildcard teams with TB/CAR and himself.
Ass Backwards
The AFC E is weird. Right now they have completely flipped their standings upside down through 3 weeks (Jets-Pats-Dolphins-Bills). Don’t be alarmed, it will all fix itself. I predict that the Dolphins will finally overtake the Bills this season, those two will find themselves on top soon enough, assuming Robo doesn’t decide that this team plays better without a coach and let’s them play on their own.
Rising Red Sea?
The NFC playoffs are going to have 1 Wildcard available (WAS/NYG and CAR/TB will take the other two). Don’t look now, but the Arizona Cardinals are 3-0 and leading the NFC W. Do I think they keep that lead? I give them a 36.2% chance to win the division, but as of right now I think the 49ers will end up winning it. That will leave the 3-0 Cardinals to fight off the 0-2-1 Rams and 0-3 Seahawks to compete for 2nd in the division, which Spencer has a big lead over already. I like the odds of the NFC West’s 2nd to be better than the NFC North, so they are my favorite for the 7 seed. Dallas could end up being a sneaky pick here as well.
Season 72 Offensive Rookie of the Year – QB Jack “Killin” Skillin, Las Vegas Raiders
Remember when BM was all like “Ben Banks is the QB of the future!!!” and then sent him to the bench for the rest of his career? That was a fun ride. J-Skillz is the best QB prospect we’ve seen in quite a few seasons, and now we get to see if he will develop into a stud or end up like Peterson in Philly.
Season 72 Defensive Rookie of the Year – MLB Jason Johnson, Minnesota Vikings
Johnson currently leads all rookie defenders in tackles and INTs, although it’s still early in the year. This past draft had a bunch of really athletic linebackers drafted in rounds 1-2, so if it’s not him, it will likely be one of his positional counterparts.
Season 72 Offensive Player of the Year – QB Baker Mayfield, Washington Football Team
As we’ve seen, this defense is going to struggle a lot after trading away two of their top CBs. That means they are going to rely on the offense to win them games. I could also see Scary Terry as another guy would could be deserving of the title, as these two will be hooking all year long. I would also keep an eye on Ruggs in LV and Zeke in Dallas, as well as Lamar and Tua.
Season 72 Defensive Player of the Year – S Jeremy Chinn, Carolina Panthers
Mr. DoItAll himself, Chinn is a playmaker who is always near the ball, regardless of where it is at on the field. With 3 INTs already on the year, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him finish with double digit INTs, 3+ TDs, and top 10 in tackles for safeties.
Season 72 Most Valuable Player – ATH Lamar Jackson, Baltimore Ravens
WHAT?! You don’t think I learned my lesson from last season? Of course I didn’t! Lamar will put up similar stats as he did last season, except this team isn’t going to be neglected all year (crosses fingers) and will be back in the playoffs. You can’t stop Lamar, you can only hope to contain him, which QB contain on the edges doesn’t work and QB spies just get outrun….. so really he can only stop himself… or if his coach goes M.I.A.
Season 72 Superbowl Prediction
Cincinnati Bengals 37, Carolina Panthers 28